Corrupt a wish!

Zargar said:
alyster said:
Zargar said:
Granted, but it has a hole at the bottom. 

I wish my pet chameleon was visible for longer periods of the day. 
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Granted, it's dead. Stare at it all you like.

I wish I had better coffee at the moment. 
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I made you better coffee but my chameleon threw up in it before you killed him. 

I wish someone made me a sandwich. 
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Granted. Hope your Chameleon tastes as nice as it looks.

I wish I had a pet pug. 

 
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Granted. It's completely empty. You may thank the burglars later. 

Wish this day would go faster

 
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Granted. But then you get bored and wish for me to ruin your wishes. 

I wish my neighbour stopped watering my plants. She doesn't have her own plants so she waters mine. 

 
Granted. No one will ever water your plants. Your girlfriend leaves you because your plants are dying and she takes it as a hint that you won't be a good parent material. You get fustrated so much about the break up that you fall into depression and start drinking. Your drinking problem gets way out of hand and after numerous warnings your boss sacks you for showing up to work wasted. With no girlfriend to help you pull out of the drinking issue you spiral continues and continues. You are unable to find new work because you drink too much, you drink too much because you can't find any work. Finally you're unable to pay your rent and the landlord has had it with you. Your neighbor that kept watering your plants does the Christian thing and takes you in. S/he keeps watering his/her own plants in front of you.

I wish someone had watered my plants during the summer. 

 
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Someone did water your plants but they still died because they didn't want to live with you anymore. And now that you've learnt that, you go around loving and petting every plant you see. But people soon start thinking that you've gone crazy and keep their distance from you. You're lonely and desolate and start popping pills day and night. You long for the simpler times when you just had to deal with me ruining your wishes. 

I wish someone would get me the e-string for my guitar because I broke it last night. 

 
Granted, you get a new string and try it out. It sounds great and a famous producer hears you testing it out. He offers you a record deal which you accept and move out of town for a month to record your new album. However your neigbour also moves out and no one is watering your plants anymore .... 

The new record is an instant success and you start touring the world. On your first concert a badly set light falls down while you're singing. It almost hit you, a close call. You keep riding the high wave of success. Your manager sues the person who was responsible for stage set up on your first concert where the light fell. It ends up bankrupting him so he commits suicide. His psychopat lover blames your for what happened and promises vendetta. However as a proper psychopat she doesn't come directly after you but goes after everyone you love. Starting with your chameleon that puked into my coffee. Later after you've stared at the dead chameleon with a sad feeling you retire to your band room, asking the maid for a sandwhich. The psychopat feeds you your own chameleon. 

I wish we had more targets to attack. 

 
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You get loads of targets to attack to attack and you kick their asses till they are all snivelling and beige. I send my neighbour over to your place and she waters all your plants. They are all healthy and green and love you so much. I finally stop ruining all your wishes and we become friends instead. All your days start going at exactly the kinda pace you want them to go at. You can finally afford your own pug litter and they lick just the regular amount. You go get your own personal barista who makes you the best coffee in the world. Your life is good and you feel fulfilled. You find a stash of really good weed and you go from 'high princess' to 'very high princess'. 

And then you wake up and realise this was all a dream and life still sucks. 

More targets. A wish for more targets. 

 
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Holy shit that was a masterpiece. very high princess X D

Granted.You find more targets and attack them. It will be an interesting fight as they aren't that incompetent. However due to better nation building you have more improvements, more resource reserves and better luck with RNG. The king of Knight Radiant is really astonished with what you're capable of pulling off and keeps sending you messages about it. You read it right after you've found some really good music to listen to. You just found this music on Youtube, it's made by some unknown garage band which has 20 views, but they are extremely good. You reccomend it to your friends as well and they all like it. After all of the success you feel tired and decide to go to sleep. Before falling asleep the last thing that goes through your mind is the thought of satisfaction that your room is so nice and clean.

In the morning you wake up with a major hangover. The new maid you hired had poisoned the sandwich. While you were tripping high you had declared war on every single Knights Radiant member in your range.  

I wish Rickky had not screwed around with my profile and not renamed it to Princess. 

 
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Granted. But then you figure it's too late for it to do any good because I'm already about to wish what I'm about to wish. 

I wish somebody would tell me if you're a girl or a guy so that I could decide whether to flirt with you or give you a hi-5 because right now I'm really confused.  O.o

 
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Granted, somebody directs you to this topic, but you still start flirting. 

I wish others would put as much effort into corrupting wishes as we did today. 

 
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